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Down Down Down in Goblin Town!

In the first Hobbit film, there is a singular scene that stands above the rest. Whose choreography and utter brilliance shines through the dark clouds of disappointment the movie gave to hardcore fans.

This isn't the scene with the dwarves stuffing their faces as they celebrate wildly, but rather, a chorus of goblins joyfully vocalising their love of their country. Patriotic cries of affection to their king, who so painstakingly crafted a song that could be called theirs.

I of course refer to Down down down in Goblin Town, the most classical tune in Lord of the Rings memory. I love Goblin Town, and it's monarch, the Goblin King, the most compelling character in Lord of the Rings history. You can't resist his charms and lovable attitude about life and people. His goblins adore him like a demigod, and how could they not?

The Goblin King is a responsible lord of his fiefdom that takes responsibility and care of his subjects and people, bolstering their lives with a powerful Gob-conomy and food farms. Yet he meets such a gruesome end in the Hobbit when the filthy Istari Gandalf cuts his head open!

Goblins deserve better treatment, better recognition for their culture and monuments to song, dance, play, work, everything! Goblins have built complex societies like the Men and Elves and Dwarves have but get no recognition! Why!? Their appearance, far too ghastly for the arrogant corrupt men running the decrepit halls of Gondorian medieval architecture, contrasting with the modern industrialised Gobo-Town.

I implore you to see past the putrid visages of the Goblins and look into their heartening personalities! They live happily in their disgusting, filth-ridden corner of the world, and they are so much happier then the overbearing and over-wrought kings of Gondor or Horselords of Rohan!

The Goblins... are the true LOTR heroes.

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